Health Check

I have been due one for ages so, in my new year, I booked a consultation with a GP (general practitioner doctor, first in line for your health concerns in the UK) but not the one I was assigned to. The same clinic has a doctor who specialises in family planning and women’s health. It…

More Pride

As you know, I went to Doncaster Pride by myself as Raven was away with her dad in Spain. She was very upset she was going to miss the festival for the second year. I was upset too because I really wanted to share the experience with her. Suddenly Manchester popped in my head. I…

Pride 2018

One weekend during my blog absence, I was lying alone in bed. I had things to do but couldn’t be bothered. It was one of those lazy moments. Raven had gone on holiday with her dad the night before and I would have a week alone with my thoughts, at least on the evenings. As…

Revelation

Yesterday, I sat with Raven chatting about dating. I told her about a recent bad experience from one of my friends. She’s young and really sweet but suffers from anxiety and had problems with depression in the past. They met through an online dating App and she gushed about him non-stop. She called him dreamy…

See You Again

I did it! My second novel ‘See You Again’ is finished on Wattpad. I hit the completed button and of course I was a little emotional. Now I start another chapter of my writing story. Make Love Your Goal is unpublished and I have to start the mammoth task of rewriting it into a series….

Attraction

I have mentioned here before that when I am attracted to someone, I just am. I’m not bound by gender or sexual orientation. There’s no reasoning behind it. Or is there? Last time I wrote about it, it happened at London’s Anime Con and it was a younger woman. I had eyes for no one…

Author Website

My author website is finally up and running! I am very proud of it. Now I need to get my books ready for publishing, which is no easy feat. I’ll be blogging there as well, only a couple of times a month. The aim is to get people to subscribe to receive first hand news…

Last Night

Last night, as you already know, I was home alone, sipping red wine and writing a sex scene for my new story. It doesn’t take a genius to imagine I was horny. I am a very sexual person and I haven’t had any action in over a year (not couting the artificial action I often…

Happy Easter

Happy Easter to all believers and happy holiday to the rest. I spent the day alone after dropping Raven at her dad’s yesterday. They are somewhere in Barcelona today. I can’t complain. In my humbler plans for her next week, we’re going to Anime Con in Manchester on Sunday/Monday and London on Thursday /Friday. She…

#MeToo – Assessment and Inspiration

Anyone with internet will have heard of the #MeToo movement created a few months ago to shed light on sexual abuse. It all started with Harvey Weinstein’s scandal and spread throughout the industry in Hollywood and reached us commoners. Many women shared their stories – ranging from uncomfortable requests, through narrow escapes to full on…

Me Being Me

I have made no secret in this blog about my sexuality. For the newcomers, I identify as pansexual. I don’t have barriers regarding sexuality or gender when falling in love. In the big context, I am who I am and I just am. I love the person regardless, even if that means someone who will…

Future

I am positive. I have a good feeling about my future prospects, even if they may take a while to become true. If you’ve been following my blog, you will know that, back in May, I had a Tarot reading done. That reading was very positive but the span for things to happen, as I…

Online Dating

This has become my fun lately. I went through a few sites and Apps, not hoping to find anyone, to be honest. I have taken to creating profiles and checking the neighbourhood. What I find only reinforces my idea that these are full of people just looking for a quickie.  Still, after a few glasses…

Lessons

There are lessons we have to learn as life teaches them. While Raven was away with her dad, in a deeply Catholic and Evangelical country, she felt in her skin what I had told her about my upbringing.  My sexuality was not welcome.  She asked a few random questions to people who would have been…

Happy New Year

2017 was hard. There’s no way around it. However, as I ponder and compare how I felt at the end of 2016 to how I feel now, I am in a much better place. 2016 ended with fights and divorce threats from barely husband’s side. 2017 started with my decision to end our marriage.  It…

9 Days

I had a good day again. I slept fine, ate well and didn’t drink. I had one glass too many last night and instigated another wild conversation with my friends. Somehow, one of them ended up suggesting that I have a threesome with a gay couple who lives close to my house.  I’ll spare you…

New Year Resolution

I love my friends! This is a sample from one of our conversations. When I say there are no barriers, I mean it. No filter!  Only names removed. πŸ˜‰ πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ Hope it makes sense! 

Confidence Boost

I think I have mentioned here that I look younger than I am. Proof is that I turned 40 and got asked for my ID trying to buy beer at the pub a couple of months ago. That wasn’t the first time in the past few years.  My reaction? I absolutely LOVE it! After I…

Full Moon Thoughts

The full moon is coming back and I’m dreaming again. Naughty dreams. πŸ™ˆ I have finally decided to buy a new charger for my camera’s battery. I can’t find the original and I suspect barely husband may have had a ‘cleaning’ moment. Amazon has promised to deliver it for tomorrow. Fingers crossed. I want to…

Writing To Reach You

Many moons ago, I heard a song called ‘Writing To Reach You‘ for the first time. It’s by Scottish band Travis. This song has always been amongst my favourites but it’s been stuck in my head lately. I have been thinking a lot about the lyrics and they have taken a different, more powerful meaning….

ONE TRACK MIND

Today two people have told me I currently have a one track mind. The first one was a work colleague, the first one I told about my split with barely husband.Β We had the following conversation: “Is that why you’ve been so aggressive in meetings, threatening to bite people’s heads off and all?” he asked me…

Dirty Thoughts

This is a post containing random dirty thoughts. I have found it very hard to control them lately. Don’t expect any real depth in my writing tonight. This is just a bit of fun as I’m a bit of a failure at being sexy as you will see. πŸ˜‰ 1. After having a few too…

Tattoo & Daydream

Today I had another three hours of work added to my tattoo, bringing the grand total to 17 hours and counting. I am still in love with it and, oddly enough, I miss the pain when the interval between sittings is too long. It seems each second of physical pain takes away something that hurts…

FICTION X REALITY

This weekend, my first Wattpad story, Make Love Your Goal, reached 14K reads.Β  I’m already publishing chapter 10 of my second story, See You Again, but because MLYG is so personal and special to me, I had to revisit the characters and write a special chapter. I named it Six Years Later and allowed myself…

NEED

I am struggling this week. I really am. I’m trying hard not to be a moody cow or Debbie Downer at homeΒ in a conscious decision because of my promise to Raven. I often stop and take a deep breath, especially when my body is giving in to the exhaustion. It has worked but it’s tough….

DECISION

I have made a tough decision. In our informal custody agreements, barely husband claimed this year Raven would spend Xmas and New Year with him. She did spend last year with me, even if only because he chose to fly last minute to his parents after an argument with me. I decided not to fight…

DREAMS

In my previous post, I mentioned dreams, more specifically dreams that put me in a good mood that continues all day. Let me try to explain. I have started writing quick notes to remind me of these dreams. There has been a recurring theme to most of them. They are centred around having a relationship…

Truce

Barely husband made an effort last week to come and say goodbye to my mom. He went to dinner with us. It was awkward but we worked through it. As I explained before, he’s always liked my mother, often getting on better with her than with his own. We kept the civility along the week…

Pride

Today is Doncaster Pride and I am here with my mom, in her first ever LGBTQ+ event.  Our relationship has come leaps and bounds over the past couple of weeks and this is the icing on the cake.  Raven would love to be with us but her dad would never allow us to take over…

AROUND IN CIRCLES

Barely husband seems to have chosen to ultimately blame my sexual orientation for the failure of my marriage. For the ones who don’t know, I am Pansexual. He keeps distorting the facts, trying to blame me for not telling him about it when I clearly told him that I had been involved with women before….