More Pride

As you know, I went to Doncaster Pride by myself as Raven was away with her dad in Spain. She was very upset she was going to miss the festival for the second year. I was upset too because I really wanted to share the experience with her. Suddenly Manchester popped in my head. I…

Revelation

Yesterday, I sat with Raven chatting about dating. I told her about a recent bad experience from one of my friends. She’s young and really sweet but suffers from anxiety and had problems with depression in the past. They met through an online dating App and she gushed about him non-stop. She called him dreamy…

Attraction

I have mentioned here before that when I am attracted to someone, I just am. I’m not bound by gender or sexual orientation. There’s no reasoning behind it. Or is there? Last time I wrote about it, it happened at London’s Anime Con and it was a younger woman. I had eyes for no one…

Author Website

My author website is finally up and running! I am very proud of it. Now I need to get my books ready for publishing, which is no easy feat. I’ll be blogging there as well, only a couple of times a month. The aim is to get people to subscribe to receive first hand news…

#MeToo – Assessment and Inspiration

Anyone with internet will have heard of the #MeToo movement created a few months ago to shed light on sexual abuse. It all started with Harvey Weinstein’s scandal and spread throughout the industry in Hollywood and reached us commoners. Many women shared their stories – ranging from uncomfortable requests, through narrow escapes to full on…

Me Being Me

I have made no secret in this blog about my sexuality. For the newcomers, I identify as pansexual. I don’t have barriers regarding sexuality or gender when falling in love. In the big context, I am who I am and I just am. I love the person regardless, even if that means someone who will…

Online Dating

This has become my fun lately. I went through a few sites and Apps, not hoping to find anyone, to be honest. I have taken to creating profiles and checking the neighbourhood. What I find only reinforces my idea that these are full of people just looking for a quickie.  Still, after a few glasses…

Lessons

There are lessons we have to learn as life teaches them. While Raven was away with her dad, in a deeply Catholic and Evangelical country, she felt in her skin what I had told her about my upbringing.  My sexuality was not welcome.  She asked a few random questions to people who would have been…

9 Days

I had a good day again. I slept fine, ate well and didn’t drink. I had one glass too many last night and instigated another wild conversation with my friends. Somehow, one of them ended up suggesting that I have a threesome with a gay couple who lives close to my house.  I’ll spare you…

Writing To Reach You

Many moons ago, I heard a song called ‘Writing To Reach You‘ for the first time. It’s by Scottish band Travis. This song has always been amongst my favourites but it’s been stuck in my head lately. I have been thinking a lot about the lyrics and they have taken a different, more powerful meaning….

ONE TRACK MIND

Today two people have told me I currently have a one track mind. The first one was a work colleague, the first one I told about my split with barely husband. We had the following conversation: “Is that why you’ve been so aggressive in meetings, threatening to bite people’s heads off and all?” he asked me…

FICTION X REALITY

This weekend, my first Wattpad story, Make Love Your Goal, reached 14K reads.  I’m already publishing chapter 10 of my second story, See You Again, but because MLYG is so personal and special to me, I had to revisit the characters and write a special chapter. I named it Six Years Later and allowed myself…

Pride

Today is Doncaster Pride and I am here with my mom, in her first ever LGBTQ+ event.  Our relationship has come leaps and bounds over the past couple of weeks and this is the icing on the cake.  Raven would love to be with us but her dad would never allow us to take over…

Writing Milestone

This weekend I have finished writing my first Wattpad book. It has been a very long journey, a labour of love, writing a story with a theme so special and important to me. ‘Make Love Your Goal’ has kept me sane in many ways. I could put all my feelings of love and acceptance of the LGBTQ+…

MANCHESTER IS LOVE

MANCHESTER IS A PLACE OF LOVE I was very lucky to spend the most wonderful three years there while going to University. There, I was integrated in a world that saw no boundaries for love. Students of all backgrounds, religious beliefs and sexual orientations lived and worked in harmony. Manchester was where I discovered myself…

BUCKET LIST

More like F*CK IT list in my current mood. A lot of things are just stuff I HAVE TO do to sort my life out. It’s not that long… I think. I haven’t written it beforehand so we’ll see! 1.     Buy my own house – I’ve had a few houses before but it has…

DATING AGAIN

No, I am not dating again but it’s something that crosses my mind from time to time. It was used as a threat of sorts by barely husband, as he tried to make me jealous. He said loud and clear that he would go out and have fun with the intention of meeting someone else because…

BREAKING POINT

Two bad arguments in two days. Things are not going well. The first one started about politics and a bad taste joke from his side that made me snap. I shouldn’t have, especially not in front of Raven. I apologised for snapping but not for my opinion. The second came about my sexuality. He finally…

RANGE OF EMOTIONS

Barely husband came home from work yesterday and he didn’t look well. He was down and embraced me, asking me to spend some time with him. I agreed feeling he needed to talk but knowing full well sex would be out of bounds as our latest attempt took me back to my sexual frustration times….

JEALOUSY

There has been another argument. Barely husband is growing increasingly jealous of my writing, especially of my leading man (Scott) in my book. He’s been vehemently arguing a case for the leading couple not to stay together. What pisses me off the most is that he uses Scott’s bisexuality as a reason for the split. HASN’T…

ANOTHER ARGUMENT

Raven usually walks the dog with barely husband on weekends.  During my exhaustion episode, they did so and she came back panicked and apologising for blabbering something to him. I couldn’t understand what she was saying straight away. My brain was slow and she was too fast.  After a few minutes, after she calmed down,…