DECISION

I have made a tough decision. In our informal custody agreements, barely husband claimed this year Raven would spend Xmas and New Year with him. She did spend last year with me, even if only because he chose to fly last minute to his parents after an argument with me. I decided not to fight…

DREAMS

In my previous post, I mentioned dreams, more specifically dreams that put me in a good mood that continues all day. Let me try to explain. I have started writing quick notes to remind me of these dreams. There has been a recurring theme to most of them. They are centred around having a relationship…

Truce

Barely husband made an effort last week to come and say goodbye to my mom. He went to dinner with us. It was awkward but we worked through it. As I explained before, he’s always liked my mother, often getting on better with her than with his own. We kept the civility along the week…

Going Home

It’s been a wonderful week in Portugal. It’s gone by too fast.  This time has been good for me. My face is even a healthy colour and I feel at least 10 years younger. According to Raven, I looked younger with each passing day here.  Now I have to go back to reality and the…

A Proper Holiday

Exactly a year ago, we went on a family holiday. Things with barely husband had gotten really bad a few weeks before but I managed to calm things down enough so we could go. I was still desperately trying to fix things, I was scared and broken. The post I managed to publish was called…

AROUND IN CIRCLES

Barely husband seems to have chosen to ultimately blame my sexual orientation for the failure of my marriage. For the ones who don’t know, I am Pansexual. He keeps distorting the facts, trying to blame me for not telling him about it when I clearly told him that I had been involved with women before….

Writing Milestone

This weekend I have finished writing my first Wattpad book. It has been a very long journey, a labour of love, writing a story with a theme so special and important to me. ‘Make Love Your Goal’ has kept me sane in many ways. I could put all my feelings of love and acceptance of the LGBTQ+…

HINDSIGHT

Hindsight is a powerful thing. You can either use it to understand where you are and how you got there, thus learning from the process, or you can torture yourself with the wrong paths taken. I am choosing the former. Yesterday, three generations of my family – my mom, Raven and I – sat down for…

Lame Excuses

I have come across an article listing lame excuses not to get a divorce. It wasn’t a masterpiece in writing and it was quite repetitive to get to the promised ’20 reasons.’ However, as I have been a victim of some of them myself, I decided to write my own. 1. Loss of Material Comfort –…

Wonderful Weekend

My weekend started with something that could have totally ruined it: an argument with barely husband.  He was questioning me regarding any additional requirements that may block the house sale. Stupid, as I made it clear that I want the house sold and our finances completely separate as soon as possible.  True to my new…

IT SUCKS! 

I’m home alone right now, crying like a baby and I don’t know what to do with myself. All evening I’ve been trying to find distractions to cover up the fact that I’d like to be out, I’d like to have company and I don’t.  I made no secret that I like sex and I…

Writing Milestone 

I usually post milestones for my Wattpad work but today I want to share two blog milestones for my ‘Diary of a Failed Marriage.’  Earlier this week this happened:  And today this happened : When I started writing, all I wanted was an outlet. I wondered if anyone would ever want to read about a…

BUCKET LIST

More like F*CK IT list in my current mood. A lot of things are just stuff I HAVE TO do to sort my life out. It’s not that long… I think. I haven’t written it beforehand so we’ll see! 1.     Buy my own house – I’ve had a few houses before but it has…

I NEED…

…a good fuck. A GREAT fuck. A mind blowing FUCK. With earth shattering orgasms. That always makes things better. Unfortunately, it’s not happening any time soon.