RAINBOW REMINDER

You may have noticed from my previous post that I picked Raven up from Drama. Her dad usually does it but he had driven to Scotland and back for work and was exhausted. I noticed his voice was very rough when I called him to ask if he was going to get her. We took…

BUCKET LIST

More like F*CK IT list in my current mood. A lot of things are just stuff I HAVE TO do to sort my life out. It’s not that long… I think. I haven’t written it beforehand so we’ll see! 1.     Buy my own house – I’ve had a few houses before but it has…

I NEED…

…a good fuck. A GREAT fuck. A mind blowing FUCK. With earth shattering orgasms. That always makes things better. Unfortunately, it’s not happening any time soon.

Birthday Wish

I turned 40. I don’t feel any different from before but this age means something. It’s the midlife point, often associated with the famous midlife crisis.  Barely husband has accused me before of doing all this due to some sort of midlife crisis. He has dropped this argument since we started getting on as friends….

CONFUSED

I have been trying to write something to post here for a few days now. More precisely since Saturday. I just can’t seem to find a sequence of words and thoughts that makes sense. I’ll just write whatever and post it anyway.  Barely husband was here again over the weekend. Raven spent the week with…

A WEEK ALONE

I have a week alone ahead of me. Well, I have the dog, which is not mine and that I never wanted to start with. *Sigh* Because I was off last week I made the decision to give myself a proper resting holiday and sent the dog off to the kennel. It is a very…

HAPPY EASTER 

It’s been an eventful weekend and our quest for family balance through the separation continues.  Barely husband wanted to take me out. He insisted a lot and I ended up agreeing after making clear yet again this did not mean we are any closer to getting back together. He said he was fine and just…

Three Months

Today marks a strange anniversary for me. The last time I had sex. Oh, well… Some things are really important, you know?  Barely husband had just come back from his family visit trip that started with an outburst of anger for me not wanting to flow through with our original travel plans. That’s a mouthful,…

Writing Milestone 10K

I have made no secret that writing has kept me sane over the past (almost) year, when things became really bad between barely husband and I.  Starting to record a story I had in my mind, a story I wanted to maybe share one day, I used pen and paper. A couple of months into…

IT’S PERSONAL

Raven has taken barely husband’s latest attack on my sexuality in a bad way.  She finds it offensive and a personal attack on her. He has sensed something and started asking me questions regarding her ‘knowledge’ of LGBTQ+ issues. He wants to know what she’s told me.  I promised her I wouldn’t tell him. It’s…

BREAKING POINT

Two bad arguments in two days. Things are not going well. The first one started about politics and a bad taste joke from his side that made me snap. I shouldn’t have, especially not in front of Raven. I apologised for snapping but not for my opinion. The second came about my sexuality. He finally…

RANGE OF EMOTIONS

Barely husband came home from work yesterday and he didn’t look well. He was down and embraced me, asking me to spend some time with him. I agreed feeling he needed to talk but knowing full well sex would be out of bounds as our latest attempt took me back to my sexual frustration times….