Today marks a strange anniversary for me. The last time I had sex. Oh, well… Some things are really important, you know?
Barely husband had just come back from his family visit trip that started with an outburst of anger for me not wanting to flow through with our original travel plans. That’s a mouthful, I know.
I didn’t really want it. I cried all through it but he couldn’t see me as it was dark.
I had had such a great, peaceful and fun time with Raven with him not being there that I think that moment was when I really made my mind up that I didn’t want to be in this relationship anymore.
The attempt at counselling was more for his sake than mine, as I was hoping to part in good terms as opposed to patching up the relationship.
Tough one. I said before I am a very sexual person and I have managed to find some solace in toys. Yes, I have an account with a very good sex toy supplier which has been a lifesaver.
This situation is not sustainable though. There’s no skin, no special touch, no excitement. It covers my basic needs but one day, I will need to move on.
Will it be the right move? Will I choose the right person? Will it be what I dream of and write about in my book? Will it be just a disappointment?
I don’t know. I really don’t. One day I will have to take a gamble to find out.
A/N: I originally posted as two months but it’s actually three. Two months ago, he moved out! Three months and I’m still sober…